This past weekend, I had a Dr. Pepper. Last week I had a Squirt. I think since I’ve quit Diet Coke, I may have had an additional Squirt and a Root Beer and perhaps another soda here or there I’m forgetting. This has been over the course of the past seven weeks, since I’ve had my last sip of Diet Coke.
The reason I bring this up is because this weekend, when I was drinking the aforementioned Dr. Pepper, my husband mentioned that he thought I shouldn’t have it since I was quitting Diet Coke and that I wasn’t as completely void of it as I’d been saying.
He made me pause alright. And think. Was there any validity to what he was saying? I wondered.
See, for me, I’ve never had a problem with soda per se. My addiction exclusively lies in Diet Coke. It is that drink specifically that I not only crave but enjoy every minute of each sip. Once I have a Dr. Pepper, I’m good for months. I have no desire to have another and another and then another.
I thought about this, though. Do I want to be completely soda free?
I don’t think its that important to me to be. Since I could maybe have a handful of sodas during a whole year, that would never even last me a weekend if it was Diet Coke.
So, no, honey, I don’t believe there’s anything wrong with having a random soda every now then. It just can’t be Diet Coke. I’ve proven to myself I’m not capable of limiting it. Sprite, though? Eh, maybe on an airplane but for my everyday thirst needs, I’ll stick to sparkling water with lemon.
54 days and counting….
It’s been a week!!!!!!!!
And you know what? The cravings have lessened, the headaches are gone and my acceptance for this new reality of mine has grown.
I won’t lie. I still miss the stuff.
And it doesn’t help that I see signs for it friggin’ EVERYWHERE.
But with each new day, my desire for that dark bubbly liquid grows smaller and smaller and I take comfort in that.
I’ll write again when I hit week two (fourteen days on the wagon!) to let you know how it’s going then…
But in the meantime, time to tackle something else – decreasing my wine intake….(not quitting, hell no, but decreasing.)
It’s been four days since I’ve had a Diet Coke and I’m not gonna lie. I miss it.
I know I shouldn’t. I know it’s ridiculous to yearn for a flippin’ soda that’s bad for me but I said I’d be honest about the process so here it is, in all its glory.
I miss it. A lot.
Like, right now, for example. As I sit here with my cup of chicken gumbo while I write, all I can think about is how much I want a Diet Coke. This has been happening all weekend to me. My inner dialogue has been on speed: “Yeah, this slice of pizza is great but wouldn’t it be so much better with a nice cold DC on ice?” “Damn, that bike ride was fun. Shouldn’t I reward myself with a can of Diet Coke?” “This movie is good but what it really needs is a glass of the dark stuff in my hand and then it would be better.”
It’s been difficult.
But like the last time I quit all those years ago, I’m replacing this addiction of mine with sparkling water and though I love those tasty clear bubbles with a fruit essence, I’m grumpy about the replacement.
I hope it’s just the withdrawal talking. I’m pretty sure it is but damn, I’m in the thick of it. The hard part. The time where I try to convince myself I can have just one.
BUT NO. I’m not going to.
I need to stay strong and wipe out this fake-sugar-filled liquid from my mindset.
Benjamin Franklin once said, “It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them.”
Damn, that man knew what he was talking about.
Today did not go well.
I caved. And I’m ashamed to say I did it quite easily.
I was grabbing a taco for lunch and saw the Diet Coke fountain machine just staring at me. It was literally right beside the register.
The universe gave me a test and I failed. Miserably.
I ordered one before allowing myself to think about it. Never a good sign. And then, to add insult to injury, the attendant handed me my change and said, “Oh, and there’s free refills.”
Universe, what are you doing to me???
Yes. I got a refill.
I was so beyond weak today.
I know this. And I have reset.
NO MORE DIET COKE. (and repeat…)
Five years ago, I quit drinking my absolute favorite drink in the world.
Now, before I get bombarded with stories about how bad it is for my body, allow me to state I KNOW THIS.
I won’t lie. I adore the taste. The kick it gives me. The bubbly satisfaction.
But I am no longer twenty one and able to turn a deaf ear to the truth. I heed it now.
Somehow though, I fell back into my addiction before even realizing it. One sip lead to one can, which led to “why not have another” to drinking three bottles a day.
I have no middle ground with this drink. I am addicted and after allowing myself to drink some a few months ago, I fell off the wagon and found myself back on the sauce within a couple weeks.
It could be worse. It could be tequila.
But when I found myself craving the third one of the day, I knew I had to stop and stop quickly.
So, after just having my last diet coke, I want to officially declare I am back on the wagon.
PLEASE hold me to this.
And come along for the ride with me. I’ll be detailing my struggle of quitting over the next couple weeks. Can’t say I’ll write everyday, or maybe I will, but I have a feeling it’s not gonna be easy (if it’s anything like last time)…